TOP TEN SIGNS that confirm ‘UMEKALIWA CHAPATI’- dominating wife, partner or girlfriend

Perhaps its common in Nyeri or Central Kenya in general, in that part of Africa Women are all powerful, men coil if their wives and mothers cough!
In Western Kenya (among the Luo, Kisii, Kuria, Luyha), Rift valley and parts of Eastern (Kamba) and most of the pastoral communities Men are powerful even the useless ones who idle in the village are powerful.
The new trend where love is the in thing, saw men take a different behaviour. Most men from the ‘tough’ communities are reported to have turned into messengers running errands for their wives- here the men in question are the mordern men in the cities, biggest casuality are those married to yellow yellow ladies with a very flat behind mostly from a certain notorious geographical area hmmmm….
Kukaliwa by your wife may have different meanings. But these are probably the simplest indicators:
1. Carrying handbags, taking, waiting and picking her from the salon
2. Tabling your entire salary for her to gawa
3. Coming home early, accounting for every second (and friends) 24/7
4. Being forced to post mushy love messages and pictures on social media
5. Putting up newspaper adverts (or calling press conferences) and car banners with her photo declaring your undying love
6. Taking her everywhere (including the green grocer’s), changing diapers, doing household chores.
7. Being sent to buy sanitary pads, washing her ngothas
8. Funding and hosting her relatives while yours wamebaki kwa mataa
9. Building a house or living where she wants in Banana, Muchatha, Gachie, Wangige Wanyee or Kinoo
10. Being beaten, sleeping on the sofa or nje kama lorry